Today, our student has been keeping a secret and is wondering when he should come out to his friends and family that he may want to be a physician!
Our questions here are taken from the Nontrad Premed Forum. If you haven’t yet, be sure to register for an account and ask away! Also, take a listen to all our other podcasts on the MedEd Media Network to help you along this journey to becoming a physician.
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[02:43] OldPreMed Question of the Week:
“I’ve been keeping my desire to go to med school as a nontrad student (I’m 30) mostly to myself until I was really sure I wanted to do it. I’m feeling ready to tell my family and friends soon, but I’m weirdly nervous about it. I come from a very supportive family and know they’ll ultimately support me, but I’m curious if anyone has any advice on dos and don’ts when it comes to breaking the news to loved ones?”
[03:10] Remove the Burden
I’ve had a lot of premeds on The Premed Years Podcast before who openly said they wish they told people sooner. When you tell somebody, it’s not a secret anymore and so it’s a burden lifted off your shoulders. You’re not running around in the dark, closing browser windows when someone walks in and wondering what you’re looking at.
Telling your family and friends removes the secrecy from your life. Hence, it removes a huge burden and it will make you feel better just having it out there.
[04:00] Get the Support You Need
Secondly, this process is so long and grueling so you need all the support you can get. You need it all. So go to your friends and family. Let them know. Hopefully, they’ll be supportive as they are and have been. And they will find ways to help support you in this journey.
[04:28] Keeping It to Yourself Until You’re Sure You Wanted to Do It
Talking to friends and family will likely help somebody figure this out sooner. Now, they can talk to other people about it. They can answer questions from friends and family members who are asking why you want to do this. Talking through this with somebody else or another human will help you figure it out sooner. So not only is the burden lifted off your shoulders, but you’re also going to figure this out sooner. Just tell them and ask them for help to help you figure out. Then once you get to that decision, then ask for their help to support you through this process.
Whether it’s your spouse or child or parent, set their expectations from the very beginning to say you’re going to be super busy. You’re going to be tired and grumpy, or whatever. But show them you’re chasing your dream at 30. And maybe they’ll want to do something similar in the future. And this could probably also encourage them to quit their job and go do something else. Ask for their support as you’re going through this process because you’re going to need that support structure.
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